Boundaries are not fortresses as I’ve said before. Healthy boundaries are beneficial but there is a time to 
consider if you’ve created barriers that are not truly helpful for you. In our Seekers class Sunday we discussed how often Christians as much as others build barriers that hold us back and prevent us from the freedom we are given by grace. Single mothers who come from troublesome relationships often put limitations on themselves. This makes entering the job market more difficult than it usually is. Landing a job requires a level of confidence that may have been damaged by divorce or even an abusive marriage. I recall an early job search of my own.
Daddy always said when it comes to getting hired, “You have to let them know if they don’t hire you they’ve made a mistake.”
I never had that much nerve until I was in real need of a job. There were three ads in the Houston Post that I thought I could handle. I had never had a ‘real job’ before, one that meant forty hours a week and a boss that meant business. This would be the first.
I started with an interview for the manager of several mall kiosks that sold common greenhouse plants in cute containers. I arrived a little early to be interviewed by a young man who wasn’t too much older than I was. He asked that I take a walk through the greenhouse while he finished some business. As I strolled the aisles I recalled gardening with Mom. I’d dearly adored flowers of every kind since childhood.
The interview began with the usual questions-background, education, job history, something I had precious little of. He began to withdraw saying, “I have two others to interview. I’ll let you know.” I thought, I can handle this job and he isn’t going to hire me. Daddy’s words came back to me and out of my mouth I heard my self say, “If you don’t hire me you’ll be sorry.”
He was stunned. So was I. He grinned, “What makes you think so?”
With confidence I replied, “Because I know the name of every plant in your greenhouse.”
He nodded. His expression more serious now, “You may be right but I’m obligated to interview the other two applicants.”
At the next interview the same day I was about to be hired as a graphic layout artist when I said to the man in charge, “I need at least $25 more a month (than they were offering).”
He left the room for a few minutes and returned with a smile. “You’ve got the job.”
My first real job and I’d have my own work area. What a thrill! I would make $400 a month.
The best thrill came at 7:30 AM when the the plant kiosk owner called to offer me the job.
“I’m sorry,” I said, “I’ve already taken a job.”
“I knew it,” he said, “I knew you would be hired by now.”
I had to force the confidence that I really didn’t feel. I stuck my neck out and learned a huge lesson. Daddy was right.
When I decided that I needed a new job, I started seeking positions for something in the “desk position” field. I had just moved to a new state, far away from everything comfortable and certainly far away from everyone and everything I knew.
The interview was downtown, are area I knew nothing about, of course, I got lost. I finally found the place and was only about 5 minutes late. Whew!
To my surprise, I was being interviewed by a woman. I should say that this took place in the deep deep south, where chivalry is definitely not dead and most big companies are run by men; and, this was a BIG company.
The interview went well I thought. The woman was very pleasing, had a big smile the entire interview and asked me some good questions. I will never forget what she said, “You are a very contagious and gregarious young lady.”
Although I did not qualify for the job, I will never forget how she made me feel and the confidence she gave me to keep on trying to find something that was just right for me.
Don’t be afraid to step out and prove that you are worth something. Sometimes the results you expect are not the ones God intended you to see in the first place. Believe in yourself.
T. Sanders
Daughter of Single Mom